Blog

Comments Off on Love Isn�t Stupid? Really Now�

Love Isn�t Stupid? Really Now�

I’ve been doing some thinking, as I am wont to do from time to time. You know the old phrase “love isn’t stupid”? Well, I’d like to put a big old asterisk (*) on that guy.

See, when you’re in a relationship, love actually isn’t stupid, it simply cannot afford to be. Love in that context should be an enveloping thing, one where your needs and the other persons needs mesh. Stupid love doesn’t seem to occur so often when that is the case. It’s when you’re NOT in a relationship that love gets stupid. It could be being single for a while and looking for love, and you’d do anything for it (including THAT – surely you understand that reference) OR recently out of a relationship and pining for the love you used to have. Either way, it’s full of foolishness, all of it. This presents a big problem I say, mostly because what you want doesn’t actually exist. Potential love is ever present, in every interaction we have on a daily basis. Do we jump at it 24/7? No. As a coach once told me, you need to be the change you want in order for others to be enrolled in it. Perhaps it’s hokey, but it’s true. When your desire for love is so great that it slips into the stupid realm, it’s time for some internal reevaluating. Why look so hard? Why push like that? It can alienate some and oftimes hurt your own self in the process. Be loveable but don’t try and force someone to love you.

I’m a big fan of love: it’s no secret that when I love (or trust for that matter, the two ARE inexorably intertwined), I love hard. Don’t let my above blurb fool you; I too am guilty of pining after things I cannot have, and yes, love has become “stupid” for me. But I’m tired, so so incredibly tired. Tired of hurting myself and tired of handing over something as valuable as my love to a void. It takes daily reminders to keep on the straight and narrow, and God knows that writing is its own catharsis. I’ve watched my friends do this to and they also get to that “I’m tired” point, some quicker than others.

They need to bring back that whole “I <3 Me” movement, at least for a spell. I only speak for myself in that loving me will never be stupid. Need to have a whole lot more of that going around.